183, 153 miles.
That was the total distance I have travelled in the last three years.
Three years of single-blessedness.
You see, a few years back, I quit my job in Manila to start my career as an international travelling consultant in my field of specialization. It was not an easy decision because I never really had any reason to leave my previous company save for the promise of exploring the world for free while earning more handsomely on the side.
That decision came with a lot of rewards but with one catch – you cannot build lasting relationships while jumping around from places to places, not knowing where you will go next or when you are coming home.
There's simply no time for love.
And so, for three years, I made sure to put myself in control of my emotions. Sure there were instances when I wanted to give in. Because why not? Love, they say, is the best thing in the world. But considering my situation, I knew that going further will just lead to a lot of pain.
And no matter what I do or how serious things may become, in the end, I will always say goodbye. That is my truth for now.
But don't get me wrong. I haven't given up on love. Heck, sometimes I even think about all those missed opportunities! Who would wish coming home to an empty apartment or hotel room all the time? I long for someone to be there.
To share laughter and tears, excitement, wonder.
To face the world and conquer our fears together.
Or to just simply enjoy the silence of a boring day.
I want all of that and more. I wish to experience that for one more time – one last time.
One lasting time.