i guess at some point, you get very mad that whatever happens in the future, you started to care no more. and with that, i just want to say that i'm taking back my word - nakakasawa na rin pala!
here i am trying to be the better me and then i find out that all this time, he did not trust me fully. ganoon pala 'yun? nakakagago pala when you realize the fact na lahat ng actions mo pinagdududahan; that every time he opens my laptop, he's searching for something that would prove his allegations; that every time he has my phone, he's looking for something that would incriminate me.
tapos kapag nagtatalo kami parang ako pa ang laging may kasalanan to the point that i will ask for forgiveness even if i did not do anything wrong. shit! all the while i was thinking that it would be for the better not to engage into any argument. all the while i was thinking that i am being more mature and considerate not to entertain bad thoughts. hell, i was very very wrong!
one year of knowing each other and yet hindi pa rin pala kami talaga magkakilala. nine months into the relationship and it would still come to this - petty issues still result to huge misunderstandings.
and it's all really because of trust.
and i'm really really starting not to care anymore.