Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Sometimes You Just Know

Definitely, I could not pick up where I left off.

A lot has happened in the last fifteen months - ups and downs and everything in between. I would have kept silent about them. After all, I'm used to keeping things to myself. Believe me, only a fraction has been written on these pages. But I guess, when one has few avenues to relay his thoughts, the subconscious mind will find a way to get it out of his system. Hence, this entry.

I thought the story of John Stan has already ended. It was a story of successes and failures, of love and hate, of falling down and standing up again, of making mistakes and learning from them. Most importantly, it was a story of hope.

But I do not own this story alone.

I see them in all the people who have seen and experienced this part of my life. I see them in readers who reached out. I see them in friends I have met on my journeys. I see them in lovers I have shared a piece of my heart.

I am the sum of all these experiences.

I am the totality of all my choices in life.

I could change. I might. 

But it will not be because of someone else. That choice is mine alone.

And when you embrace me, it's not just the true, the good and the beautiful. You have to embrace the darkness that comes with it.

It's either all of me or none at all.

It does not really entail a lot of thinking. It does not need proof nor evidence. You just believe.

Because sometimes you just know.